@batkaren: Misread the movie guide and thought the movie about to start was Allen vs Predator, and I was like, “you got this, Allen.”
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@Brentweets: "Fluffy died today" "Oh my god I'm so sorry, was he a cat or dog? "He was a boa constrictor" "Well that made me feel better"
@Sophie2078: Never date an intelligent, incredibly handsome, wealthy man. He's a violent psychopath that wants to kill you *things i learned from horrors
@marcia_bee: Imagine me in bed. Wrong. Wetter. Wrong again. Wetter. Wrong AGAIN! Soaking wet. This leaky roof is gonna cost me a fortune to fix!
@poutinesmoothie: *bends over to pick a four leaf clover but gets struck by a falling ACME safe before doing so*