@barfolishus: My cat just meowed and it sounded like he said "ugh" and I've never agreed with him more
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@sgtblueeyes: I told her it's been a while. She told me that was fine. It's just like riding a bike. Now she's mad I checked her for proper inflation
@LLCoolJeffrey: Hobbies include: 1. Crying about the past 2. Procrastinating in the present 3. Worrying about the future
@JennyJohnsonHi5: I’m pretty sure Hitler himself would kill Baby Hitler, afterall he killed regular Hitler.
@spark_asis: I don't get why someone would want the house in a divorce. "your honor, I'd like to keep the building where my soul was sucked dry."