Maybe she was just being paranoid, but Wendy couldn’t help feeling that she was being monitored.
My favorite way to mop the bathroom floor is to give the kids a bath.
The walls, too.
Yup, and ceiling.
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judge: your word is problematic
me: then maybe give me a different word
*notices battery is at 4%*
*goes into airplane mode*
*turns down brightness*
*exits all apps*
*prays to jesus and compliments his sandals*
I was raised Catholic. I know all the rules. And I broke most of them. 😈
E-Mail: Drive her wild in the bedroom.
Me: Feh…I’ll drive her wild in the kitchen
*Re-arranges the dishwasher.
Top Tip: Don’t name your kids after places, objects or things you see on the internet
Me: Sorry son, it seemed like a good idea at the time
Just yelled “F, YOU GUYS!” to my students.
Another perk of being a music teacher…
Tom Cruise has signed on for Mission Impossible V. His impossible mission is trying not to show up on everyone’s gaydar.
GOD: welcome to Heaven I will answer any question you want now.
ME: why does Target have 25 checkout lanes with only 2 always open?
If she’s interested in you she will reply
If she isn’t, she won’t
Unless she’s thinking about it then who knows how long it could take