@DurtMcHurtt: My first base coach won't let me practice kissing, I hate baseball.
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@SufficientCharm: The easiest way to confuse a man is to wear a straight jacket that accentuates your cleavage.
@smithsara79: Me: [to my sister] Oh yeah? If I'm not mom's favorite, then why am I the only one she ever asks to housesit when she takes everyone on vacation each summer?
@i_wasnt_looking: Pharmacy employee you're too unhappy for someone who is in control of all the drugs.
@heyitsJudeD: My husband's really not keen on this whole 'date night' thing that married people are supposed to do...... Perhaps next time I should go out with him?