@PinkCamoTO
@JiminyKicksIt
You’d better czechoslovakia before you wreckyoslovakia.
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@JiminyKicksIt
@DomesticGoddss
Just showed my 4 yo niece that I can still do a cartwheel and now she is showing me where the ice packs are.
@MommaUnfiltered
The smoke detectors just went off in my house and no one even looked up from their phones.
@E_lok44
Coyotes are dangerous, stay away.
If you keep this in mind, you will lessen your chances of being hit by an anvil.
@thegayfarmerguy
Doc: You have gallstones
Me: Ugh.
Doc: You can control it with diet.
Me: Great!
Doc: No chocolate, cheese, fried foods…
Me: Take it out.
@Super_Cynthia
[Commercial for hobbies]
Like drugs for people who don’t do drugs.
“HOBBIES”
@McClaneJohn2
Does anyone know the cheat code to set life to easy mode?
@iamopeimu
My Ex works in a pharmacy,so whenever i want to spoil her mood I wil just go there and buy condom for no reason sometimes i go 3 times a day
@JimmerThatisAll
I live in a high crime neighbourhood if you count downloading gardening shows illegally.
@SashaBrenner
One of the wheelchair basketball team players has been tested positive for WD40 🙁