@LuvPug: My husband and kids have started humming Darth Vader's Imperial March whenever I walk into the room and I've never felt more complete
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@ericas_twit: Just saw a billboard: $586.25 Complete cremation. 1) Is there partial cremation? 2) What's the 25cents for?
@JermHimselfish: My girlfriend buys candles the same way I buy weed. She looks at the color, opens it and smells it, buys it, then lights it on fire to relax