@Darlainky: My jeans aren’t too small, they’re my compression pants.
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@GoldenSpirals: He told me I was the "bee's knees". I believe I merit being compared to something more like a lemur's femur. Who doesn't love Zoboomafoo?
@asherperlman: me: *click* ceiling fan: still on me: *click* ceiling fan: still on me: *click* ceiling fan: one more me: *click* ceiling fan: jk. was off. now back on and faster than ever!
@dubstep4dads: Me: this is bullshit. conditioner and shampoo in one? impossible Walmart employee who I have in a headlock: sir I didn't make the shampoo