My kid lost a tooth and plans to put it under her pillow tonight so the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy can meet and hopefully make a love connection and I am HERE FOR IT

You Might Also Like


People who take things literally on twitter, stop.

Wait. First take this tweet literally, then stop.


[son comes running into our room]
“Dad, there’s a monster in my room!”
Look, Marky, what-
Right, Mikey. What makes u think I care?


One of my son’s classmates saw me on camera and asked if I was Snow White so yes I’d say my tan has faded


There is actually a grim reaper for every species. The mantis reaper is the coolest and the scariest and she doesn’t even have to use a scythe.


Who would have believed that the perfect Wikipedia photo caption could have been improved upon?


Me: How is your chicken?

Mario: It needsa salt.

Me: Uh… ok *punches chicken*


[dead at the bottom of the pool in a mermaid outfit]

him: *sadly* it was supposed to go over your legs


RRH: Grandma, what big eyes you have. And what big ears you have. And what big TEETH you have!

Grandma: You’re my least favorite grandchild