@: [outside the Club] Bouncer: name? Daenerys: Daenrys Stormborn Bouncer: [checks list] sorry your name’s not on the list Daenerys: try Khaleesi Bouncer: [checks list] no Daenerys: Queen of the Andals? Bouncer: [checks list] no Daenerys: Mother of Dragons Bouncer: [checks list] no

@Book_Krazy: Me: *excited* I bought a bunch of Christmas carbs just like you said! My boss: You mean Christmas cards? Me with doughnut glaze all over my face: what My boss: what

@totalwackjob: My sex life has improved so much I'm thinking of asking someone else to join me...

@DrDogMD: PATIENT: I bet medical school was pretty tough DR DOG: yeah I remember one time I did an assignment 4 times bc I ate the first 3 copies lol

@ShootyDoody: Friend: So, how did you two meet? Husband: In a bar. Wife: The air had just begun to take a chill, I remember I was wearing a new scarf. Change was in the air, but I had no idea my whole life was about to be turned in upside down. When I walked into the dimly lit pub...