Hannah is single for a reason
Never name drop…
Sandy Bullock taught me this.
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SNAKE CHARMER: Well ain’t you a cutie
COBRA *blushing*: tee hee
I don’t want to be a millionaire, I just want enough money to be able to stare off into the distance while pumping gas.
Does anyone have the number of a painter/decorator? I really need to get all my windows jammed so they never open again.
Hockey fights are cool but imagine the make up sex afterwards in the locker room.
911: Did you ring yesterday?
911: Day before?
Boy: Definitely not
911: Your voice is familiar
Boy: Please just help
911: Ok can you describe your attacker?
Boy: It’s a wolf
911: Oh for fu
It wasn’t a crisis until my mother heard about it.
What doesn’t kill you leaves you feeling rejected and wondering why you weren’t good enough for death.
I drink expresso irregardless of the time, because, for all intensive purposes, its good for my sole. Also, it keeps my brain alot sharper.
COP: So you play the tuba do ya?
“No, the violin”
COP: Treble maker eh?