@StarWarsProblms

Obi-wan: It’s over Anakin! I have the high ground!

Anakin:*Force pushes him out of the way*

Obi-wan: Damn that completely obvious solution

You Might Also Like

@fro_vo

a bunch of people at a school dance waiting to get a drink

that’s it. that’s the punch line

@ArfMeasures

Movie Exec: Give me 3 realistic ideas or you’re fired

Me: A rat becomes a chef

Movie Exec: ok

Me: A dog plays basketball

Movie Exec: Good

Me: A main character has a bottom row locker at school

Movie Exec: Get out

@kelkulus

Help your friends diet by replacing the light in their fridge with an air horn.

@3sunzzz

[wine class]

Swirl your wine. Inhale its aroma. What do you smell?

ME: wine

Can you smell its buttery oaky notes?

ME: nope, still wine

@Mom_Overboard

[drunk, yelling at a can of baked beans] ALEXA PLAY BENNIE AND THE JETS

@LizHackett

If a bear confronts you in the woods, make it go away by handing it a flyer for your boyfriend’s band’s show.

@Book_Krazy

Interviewer: Any questions?

Me: On the sitcom Friends, how come the only couch at the coffee shop was always available for them?

@lgbk44

as a kid, I used to think $1,000 was a lot of money. But now that I’m an adult, I think it’s a tremendous amount of money

@pkollar

video games allow you to journey to wondrous locations straight out of your dreams such as: warehouse, sewer, and subway tunnel

@HeyZeus666

The key ingredients for a successful diet :

Duct tape
Rope
Rat poison
Shovel
Bag of lime
Alibi

What?…wait. Wrong list.