i wish it was legal to speak up during a haircut if theyre doing something you dont want. sadly you just have to sit there
for my next trick i will fall asleep 15 minutes into the movie i begged us to watch
Thinking about getting real into bonsai trees. It seems like an expensive hobby that I’ll lose interest in almost immediately, which is right in my wheelhouse
I cleaned the outside of our stainless steel refrigerator, and now we can never touch it again.
Here’s the complete list of must have items for a middle aged woman when travelling away from home:
– Tweezers
Me: *considering sleeping in*
My dog: No no no no no let’s go let’s go let’s gooooo.
If I was a Spice Girl I would be Mild to Medium Spice
*2 dogs watching a person walk into the house. one of them whispers to the other*
now, try not to go berserk but that’s the guy who knows where all the treats are
@mariana057 If an Apple Store is in disrepair, is it an iSore?
Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.
If you watch an Apple store get robbed, are you an iWitness?
Muscle memory, but it’s the Amazon driver pulling up to my house on the odd day he doesn’t have a package for us.
My one egret is eating at the aviary. My food had a heron it.
Mad that so many renaissance artists were named after ninja turtles
It always starts out “you’re so funny” and ends with “oh dear… oh my god… wtf”