Hi everyone,
Funny Tweeter is undergoing maintenance during which certain features of the site won’t be available. We’re trying to get back to normal as soon as possible. 😊
Yes, I have been awake since 5am. Just not a “productive member of society” level of awake. For that you need to wait until about 11:30am when I will wash up 5 mugs & send an email. Then I’ll get hungry & we’re back to square one.
No I don’t carry “a” grudge. I carry like 20 grudges and keep about 50 more in storage to sort through later.
My 2yo thinks 5 am is a great time to discuss the mysteries of life.
Judging by the hair on my black shirt , I’m surprised I have any cat left at all.
Teens – Slay all day
20s – Rosé all day
30s – Bidet all day
40s – Bengay all day
If Optimus Prime led a Transformers symphony, would he be a semi conductor?
I need to find just the perfect men’s swimsuit and then only ever wear it twice annually
Guess who taught himself how to open the rice cooker and woke me up by screaming in between mouthfuls of hot rice
Had a customer in tonight moaning that the tyre pressure machine was free but now we charge 50p.
I shrugged and said “that’s inflation” and he didn’t even laugh why do I even bother?
stop
