Any house is an Airbnb if you’re quiet enough
There’s a great new book on minimalism but I only read the blurb because I believe that’s what the author would want.
I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.
Who called it a French guy that has a cat rather than Jean clawed?
Looking at the huge commercial success of the ‘Barbie’ movie means I’m already bracing myself for the inevitable ‘Mr. Clean’ movie starring Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson.
We can put a man on the moon but we can’t find a good way to drink wine from a lying down position.
people often debate spf levels, but i’ve always found the most effective sunscreen to be the roof of an air conditioned house
I optimistically invited guests for this weekend while my house was unusually clean and now a week later I see why that was a mistake
I’m never more in denial than when I pack running clothes for a weekend trip to the beach.
Just got back from seeing my naturopath and she suggested a treatment plan that involves improved diet and exercise.
The nerve of some health experts.
The closest I come to hiking is when I eat trail mix.
What’s a retweet called now?
I vote Xerox.
Things I can’t tell if missus saying to me or animals.
Food is ready.
Don’t lick that.
Don’t hump that.
Stop growling.
I love you.
Put your penis away.
Get back here.
Don’t eat that.
Get out.
Come here.
What are you doing with my underwear?
Don’t bite.
Whoever has my voodoo doll can you give it a job
No one:
My dog on our 6 am walk: this is my emotional support dirty sock