still not “these beanie babies are going to be worth so much later on” rich and it hurts.
ME: *Buying unnecessary & expensive gadget*
CASHIER: How will you be paying for this?
ME: Probably with an argument and no sex for a month
I love the National Park Service.
We need to put an American base on the sun
ChatGPT cannot be stopped.
I mean…but I did
Am I unemployed … or just playing hard to get with capitalism
me: *stabs vampire*
wife: omg
me: *beats zombie to death*
wife: OMG
me: what
wife: ur supposed to give them candy
Just found a pot of houmous by the side of the road
“Waitress!”
Waitress: “Sir?”
“Could you check the rest-room? My date has been gone 2 hours. Also, her coat has been stolen”
*Goes to Nirvana themed
“Come as you are” Party**Gets arrested for indecent exposure*
Story of my life…..
I’m so down for anne frank demon slayer
If I’ve learned anything from Disney, it’s this:
If you happen across a woman’s corpse, in the forest? Kiss it.
There are some “IDIOTS” in this world, That Always Reply “NO” to every question we ask them….
now tell me, Are you one of Them?