When walking by the school’s lost and found area dads can’t stop themselves from saying “you wanna go shopping, get a new coat?”
Eggs are a healthy breakfast, which is why I don’t feel guilty eating cage free Reese’s ones.
Jack Black is trending? Hey if it’s 1998 again maybe I can fix some mistakes
Get in loser we’re going crying
Sorry, I can’t be the bigger person. I’m the size of the average 4th grader.
She just wanted a better look at her surroundings
I either need to win the lottery or get bitten by a vampire and gain the power of the night. But preferably the lottery.
they should invent a device that lets other people comprehend how stupid I know them to be
Wait a minute
My grandma got this digital frame that all the family can remotely upload pics. I’m thinking of flooding it with John Wick pictures.
The craziest thing about teaching is how you will straight up meet doppelgangers of previous students. Choking back telling them to get outta here. I taught you already
when someone asks me my body count do they mean like ted bundy or stormy daniels.
The neighbor’s 5yo keeps yelling “are we boyfriend and girlfriend” across the fence at my 5yo, and my kid just came running in the house and slammed the door, so I guess that answers that
peep davidson