Airlines will call themselves Air France then fly from Costa Rica to Germany
Indoor weekend with a toddler whose sleep schedule is backsliding.
There really should be more social media sites that pit our closest friends against each other to make our top 8.
Son: It’s spring break, what are we doing?
Me: Working, “we” are working.
mechanics be like
Lol #dogsoftwitter
This is funnier than it should be. 😂
A man who pretends to be rich in order to attract pretty, young women is not a “Sugar Daddy”.
He’s an artificial sweetner.
How to properly lift a body
Wanna stand off to the side of a golf gallery in a Teletubby costume
I love that technology has advanced so much that Alexa can understand me with my mouth full of crisps
Cartoons falsely taught me to expect encountering an unimaginable amount of anvils in my day to day life
I once conjured a blizzard to get out of a “lunch date”.
me: i was doing crossfit on the night in question
cop: ur not even a suspect
me: i just wanted u to know