Aw, crap. My airbnb has one of those cellars with a man locked in a cage who claims he’s just a normal man who was kidnapped but the property owner says he’s actually the devil in human disguise and if I let him out, his evil will end the world.
AND the wifi is spotty. Christ.
I love it when I’m cooking a meal and half way through I realise I don’t have all the ingredients so I improvise by eating a cake instead.
If someone ghosts you, respect the dead & never disturb them again.
⚰
Most intimate spam text i’ve ever received
ME: [picking up the surprise cake for my wife] I guess you could say I’m bringing home the bakin lol
CASHIER: I just can’t believe someone married you.
“the only thing standing between you and your dreams is you” yeah have you met me that’s gonna be a problem
If you pull this stunt in front of me at security stg I’ll call the cops
this sign has the same social anxiety i have
Body: it’s sleepy time.
Brain: it’s thinky time.
The fastest mammal on earth is me when I’m retweeting your typo tweet.
Sure, I’ll come to your party
*hangs out with the Roomba when I see they have no pets
I picked my nephew up from daycare today, Mind you, he’s biracial but looks like a white kid. They asked him if he knew who I was and why did this man look me dead in my face and say he didn’t know me…
Had them people ready to call the cops on me.
Difference between GPT-4o and o1. 😁
