To the thief who stole my self-cloning machine, how can you live with yourself??
Explained how to make an April Fools Day joke to Miss 9.
“Mummy, you look pretty today.”
If you’re on the fence about becoming a parent.
My wife is listening to an ad about chainsaws. I’m worried.
I’m Sold!
Tell me a story and include details but not too many details like I don’t need to know about a suspicious mole
if you’ve ever been worried about pitching something crazy at your job, imagine being the person who suggested taking temperatures rectally
Yoplait
I plait
We all plait for foreplait.
Every country has a wafer cookie, and every country thinks they invented it
My kids keep fighting over who gets to fool me next and maybe that’s the real prank
Oh. My. God.
my cat when i respond to his mournful meows for treats every half hour with “oh we’re singing now?” and start melodically meowing back at him
