I throw open the heavy doors to reveal a vast library. You scan the seemingly endless volumes, realizing too late & with gnawing dread that the collection in its entirety is comprised of 1980s-era microwave cookbooks as I close & lock the doors behind me.
The pasta is now
Me:
Mime:
Me: You don’t say!
I’m scared. I just got poked on Facebook.
To the thief who stole my self-cloning machine, how can you live with yourself??
Explained how to make an April Fools Day joke to Miss 9.
“Mummy, you look pretty today.”
If you’re on the fence about becoming a parent.
My wife is listening to an ad about chainsaws. I’m worried.
I’m Sold!
Tell me a story and include details but not too many details like I don’t need to know about a suspicious mole
if you’ve ever been worried about pitching something crazy at your job, imagine being the person who suggested taking temperatures rectally
Yoplait
I plait
We all plait for foreplait.
Every country has a wafer cookie, and every country thinks they invented it