About 6 years ago, a new lad at work would have been sacked if I hadn’t spotted what he was doing wrong and stepped in. Now, he’s my manager & records my weekly performance. Without fail I’m 100-110%. It’s really nearer 30% with the rest of the week spent playing FIFA. Cheers bud
At my age I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.
(skipping class)
friend: what about the hall minotaurs?
me: you mean hall monitors?
*slow stomping noises*
Headless mannequins are great because they let you see how you’ll look wearing a new shirt after you’ve been decapitated
🧠
“How stressed are you?”
Me:
Someone has just suggested that when we check-in cases, we should put a label on them that states their destination. Absolute game changer.
I’m wearing the tie I got married in more than 20 years ago and I don’t want to brag but… it still fits.
Me: *looking fly*
Target self-checkout camera: lol no
My 5yo: WHY DID I NOT GO TO THE FUNERAL?
Me: Well, you would have had to be quiet for an hour.
5: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I AM REALLY NOT GOOD AT THAT.
Some people can start a task and then just finish it instead of trying to do a hundred things at once like a squirrel on crack
Nice tots you got there. Be a shame if someone tatered em.
technique
