kinda rude that my bank told me how much money i spent on food this month. what if i didn’t want to know that
How wrong was this guy?
The Dalai Lama prefers quiet restaurants in order to find dinner peace.
I’m likely to die of a household accident. I’m certain a spider will be involved.
Everyone hates big pharma until they have a headache.
figuring out my emotional availability:
WEAR CLOTHES OTHERS DARE NOT.
Probably good whoever named this one didn’t get to name any other planets.
Working from home is the best. Whenever I take off my bra at the office, people get so weird.
The thing I like about Dawn dish detergent is that I can wash my dishes, my pets, my gentles, and my car with it, and still have some to drink later.
How much did Santa pay for his sleigh.
Nothing, it was on the house.
#Christmas #RubbishJokes #AmazingFacts
Pack fruit in your lunch so it can decorate your desk until you take it home again.
i asked my husband to get something larger than the tiny bottle of olive oil he usually buys…
“It’s a girl!” but it’s just my family finding out that our dog is not a boy like we thought for the last two months.