My 2 year old asked me for potato and kept getting mad at me when I gave her potatoes to eat.
It took a good 20 minute meltdown before I figured out that she calls play-doh potato.
Learning a new language has been hard for both of us.
Sorry kids I missed your childhood, I was busy trying to set a strong password
Whenever someone doesn’t text me back, I just assume we’re in a fight that I wasn’t aware of.
Wanna hear a joke?
Sleep.
I know, I don’t get it either.
“Release the Kraken” I say as I push “clean” on the Roomba.
the guy inventing artificial banana flavor: whatever close enough
the guy inventing artificial banana flavor: whatever close enough
“I don’t want to sound ungrateful, Carl, but I think I’ll get the bus to work tomorrow”
The USS B port
My kid asked where babies come from and I said everywhere, man, they’re worldwide.
Kids should come with a “skip intro” button for their stories
