idk why doctors only give stickers to kids?
like hello i was also brave today
do you think crabs are self-conscious about walking sideways everywhere or do they think everyone else has the problem
Airports should have tattoo parlors for those of us with long layovers and poor impulse control
it takes so much energy
I decided not to go for a run today because of the weather but mostly because of the running.
What’s the best registration plate you’ve seen?
my mom decorated the apartments for the cats
Remember in the early days of the internet, when you’d go on chat rooms and it was just a scrolling screen of strangers yelling random things? It’s amazing how much has changed since then
Me: “I’m going to the gym.”
The gym:
Sometimes, I have to remind myself that just because my 13yo is much taller than me doesn’t mean he’s in charge.
It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it
My 3yo said scales measure how fast we are. So anyway, I stepped on our scale and I’m a lot faster than I thought I was.
