Having a boyfriend is so awesome like there’s just a guy in ur house whose job it is to know where countries are and what exactly Watergate was
my kids wanted fruit instead of cinnamon rolls this am so now I’m left wondering what heinous tantrum is coming later to equal it all out
Oops, I ate my feelings again.
~ a memoir
Coffee can’t solve all of my problems, but it can reduce the criminal charges for the future.
Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping.
this is what happens when everyone feeds the same stray
Wait for it. (You won’t regret it).
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SHE SAID YES!! 😍😍😍💍💍💍 i asked my mom if she was disappointed in me!!
“i absorbed my twin in utero” dont care. not even impressive. i absorbed a guy just last week. fully grown man. had a family. might absorb them too
The struggle is real
I can’t listen to music with my headphones at the office. Apparently everyone doesn’t enjoy the way I sing out loud
