When I awoke this morning my husband lovingly walked toward me, bent down, kissed the dog on the forehead and whispered, “I won’t be long” then left in case you want to know what a rockin’ hot marriage is like
very rude of my sister to give birth to twins on the same day we think might be my cats birthday. richard鈥檚 spotlight will not be robbed.
Jerry: He offered you a red pill and a blue pill?
George: Two pills, no water
Jerry: No water?
George: No water
Jerry: Cant take a pill without water
George: Never could
Jerry: So what鈥檇 you do?
George: I left. I鈥檓 not choking down a dry pill
Kramer enters in a leather coat
I鈥檝e been laughing for an hour straight
tag yourself, i’m “man in green bird costume”
Now that鈥檚 a Halloween costume! 馃ぉ
That’s a good costume, I hope.
Just a reminder that The Batman is a Halloween movie the same way that Die Hard is a Christmas movie.
girls don鈥檛 even dress up for Halloween, they just put a black outfit and choose between devil horns or cat ears
Halloween cuteness.. 馃巸
馃帴 IG: mr.smokey21
The greatest Halloween decoration you鈥檒l ever see
waiting for halloween be like:
STOP using Halloween as an excuse to dress slutty – dress slutty every day
I have eaten all the Halloween candy, so this year trick or treaters are getting Taco Bell鈥檚 hot sauce packets
I made popcorn.
Teen smelled popcorn.
I no longer have popcorn.