“this is the biggest toilet I’ve ever seen”
This is Narla. She was not allowed to go to the park. And now you are not allowed on the couch. 13/10
the perfect number of cats is two stupid cats. preferably siblings. but they can’t both be the same type of stupid. one needs to be stupid (dumb) and one needs to be stupid (annoying)
It is a shame that nothing is built in America anymore. I just bought a TV that said: “Built in Antenna”.
I don’t even know where that is.
i dont want to consume AI art for the same reason i dont call up my boys every sunday to watch a conveyor belt quickly and efficiently deliver a football to an endzone
My husband and I take turns unloading the dishwasher, but I usually rerun it or pretend it’s his turn. He does the same, so basically, the dishwasher hasn’t been unloaded in three years.
Someone in their late 20s giving advice to someone in their early 20s is exactly like when a toddler is obsessed with a newborn
anyone else’s big brother text them like an unwilling roadman situationship
merriam-webster followed and then unfollowed me. not very definitive of them
My kid invented a game but told me it was too complicated and I wouldn’t understand. Reader, he is throwing a stuffed animal repeatedly in the air and catching it
Me going back to a library branch I used to work at to pick something up
Good morning.
New word: Biscgret.
Meaning: The feeling when someone offers you a biscuit and you refuse, and you spend the rest of your time with them secretly wishing you’d accepted the biscuit.
you gotta separate the art from the artist. like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks
Turning to the person next to me and saying “thanks for nothing” as I get off the train