Everyone else time travelling: *preventing wars or the spread of disease*
Me: *buys multiple pairs of my favorite shoes they’ve stopped making*
The worst part of all-you-can-eat buffets are all the witnesses
Throws some pepperoni slices into my Mac ‘n Cheese. Adds ‘Master Chef’ to my resume.
Make your kid’s next birthday a surprise party by taking them to Walmart.
I don’t know why my co-workers looked so grossed out. All I said was, “It’s time to make like a tampon and get out of this bloody hole.”
Why do I have to work today? I worked yesterday! What more could you possibly want from me.
We will use anything but the metric system
Sharks 🦈 waiting on there food delivery 😂
I can’t stop watching this.
Eeeekkk go for it 😂😂
🐶😂
inside you there are two whales, one is a whale, the other is also a whale, as mentioned previously