Salons always have hair on the floor. Garages always have oil on the floor.
Banks, what is your problem?
the most incredible thing about James Bond is the way he can walk into any hotel room and immediately know how to use the shower
Just got my first “let’s hold off on this conversation until the New Year” email. Absolutely ecstatic
shakira sharkira
my boyfriend just said “i encourage you to try all things” to our cat who was licking up buffalo sauce
do not feed a big man 12 eggs a day. you super charge a big man’s egg power levels to that extent he will devour your other family members. trust me I learned this the hard way
Creative Problem Solving
Tuesdays are the worst so here is the funniest video of all time
Hi, it’s me. The guy who was just complaining about it being to warm in November. You might think this would preclude me from *also* complaining about how cold it’s gotten now but I contain multitudes.
my 15 yo doesn’t understand why he gets diarrhea after he eats only Pepperoni sandwiches, ramen noodles and 37 pizza bagels every day. It’s a real damn mystery.
