It doesn鈥檛 really matter who wins today as long as both candidates tried their best and had fun.
Hmmmmmmm….
No self control, must pet the kitty 馃槀
People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.
*Into hospital bathroom emergency intercom*: um, someone put the toilet roll on backwards
Being my friend is a walk in the park, but the park is on fire and sometimes the squirrels eat your cookies
He went from scream to scary movie in seconds馃槶
I like to scan my backyard every hour with a high power flashlight to let my neighbors know I won’t tolerate any weirdness around here
I’ve just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax.
Voting is the worst group project
indiana??? now they鈥檙e just making up states
A map of the US presidential election results if you are viewing it as a dog
No president next term. America needs to be single for a while to focus on herself.
should i airdrop this to the person in the voting booth next to me
