Getting left on read really gives me perspective on what Nigerian princes go through
unfortunately thanks to anesthesia we’ll never know if internal organs can be ticklish
British drink offers for guests:
“Tea?”
“Coffee?”
“Water?”
“Squash?”
“Juice?”
“Beer?”
“Wine?”
“Something stronger perhaps?”
“I think I’ve actually got some [insert any quite obscure drink here] somewhere?”
“What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?”
I’ve FINALLY found out what chronology is.
And it’s about time.
I just tried to groom my dog myself, and I now fully understand why the dog groomer charges more for a haircut than my own stylist.
I feel like HGTV is creating some false expectations for the attractiveness of the contractor you hire for home renovations.
I look after plant pots and hanging baskets for celebrities, which means I tend to shrub holders with the rich and famous.
Congratulating #CrowdStrike for reaching its carbon neutrality targets six years early through its disruption of global air traffic today!
Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can’t even get into my own pants.
Crowdstrike : its fine u just have to manually visit the PC boot it into safe mode and remove a sys file
US Organization with 50,000 pcs and a completely outsourced IT department in Bangalore : what
My mum just messaged to say that yesterday she turned off her 20 year old PC, ‘at the wall’, without shutting it down properly. ‘That couldn’t have caused anything, could it?’ 😂
‘Probably’.
bragging about how I’ve “really turned my life around recently” without mentioning in which direction
True story: The tweets of a guy I follow that are always talking about Victorian people started making a lot more sense when I realised he lives in Victoria, Australia.
Nice to have free crisps in the hotel room and these look definitely fit for Consumption.
