Why would I go to my high school reunion? I didn’t want to be there the first time.
not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergasgusting rn
security at this bar said no outside food and I said this is my “emotional support wonton soup” and he said “what” and I got quiet but we’re inside now
moo deng still has yet to endorse a candidate and that’s so telling wow
Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.
2am Sunday morning and bam! it’s 1am again
Me: what the hell…I already did this hour
I had to manually change the channel on the TV because the batteries in the remote died, and now the kids think I know magic.
the clocks on the oven and the microwave this morning:
typical orange cat and void cat behavior
why did I just deep clean my entire apartment before the john mulaney and chappell roan saturday night live episode like they’re physically coming over
Now who done made this a sport lmao
This Turtle was Found by U.S. Coast Guard with $53 million Worth of Cocaine Attached to It.
