This Turtle was Found by U.S. Coast Guard with $53 million Worth of Cocaine Attached to It.
took my kids to the trampoline park and within minutes one of them was attending a stranger’s birthday party and the other one let me know that she had made an ‘enemy for life’
(The most unconvinced I have ever been in my life) that makes sense
it sucks that brainwashing is a bad thing because generally speaking the idea of washing my brain sounds so nice
British people
If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.
it’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months
here we go again
Did we do it, did we save the daylight
Accidentally turned my clocks back too far and ended up at a Wham concert.
if i text u “🪗” it means u better start acting accordingly
My eggs wouldn’t ring up at the store and the cashier (an older Black man) said “it’s your lucky day!” And put them in my bag for free because “I ain’t calling that manager over here cuz I don’t like him. I’m old enough to be his father and I ain’t going back and forth with him”