Package delivery vans should play music when they’re driving through a neighborhood like ice cream trucks do
I love writing tweets but what I really want to do is direct and produce them
linkedin the good parts
95% of the ocean is unexplored which means there could be a mcdonalds down there
When you ask for your phone charger back and your teenager has the audacity to ask “what percentage are you on?”
The One that Got Away… a memoir of a french fry lost in a crevice beside the driver’s seat and the aroma that made it impossible to forget.
Kicked it off with someone at the store, talked about how hard it is to make friends as adults and we both wish it was like when we were kids and you could just ask someone to be your friend, said “well it was nice to meet you!” turned around and drove home
(from the bottom of a well) is this the trap
Like sleeping!
Ah 1994, I remember it like it was thirty years ago.
*starts crying*
I wasn’t feeling well so I googled my symptoms. I either have allergies or I died two days ago.