Yes!
Great!
Bravo!
Hurrah!
Yippee!
Cheers!
Hooray!
Rah Rah!
Woo Hoo!
Whoopee!
Awesome!– Excerpt from “Fifty Shades of Yay!”
Black ice is just like regular ice…
Except it’s a better dancer…
“Last Christmas” is a strange song. It’s been 12 months and we’re just now addressing this situation?
Instagramming daily selfies does not constitute personal growth.
one time i slam dunked a basketball so good we were out of school for a week people just needed time to process
When it comes to politics I’m an agnostic. I don’t believe there’s an honest politician nor can I prove that one does not exist.
My husband and I both have colds but only his is really really bad.
When asked my theory on Amelia Earhart’s disappearance I said “maybe she went black” and now I don’t have to help with homework
Where do I see myself in five years? *kicks feet up on desk* Sir, does my resumé list “psychics abilities” under skills? No. Next question.
What’s the difference between carbon monoxide and spouses?
Carbon monoxide is a silent killer.
Hey microwaves that make me hit a “time” button before I start pressing numbers: what else would I be trying to do here, make a phone call?
Was standing in my front yard this evening and some neighborhood kids tried to deflate me.
“Beat up anybody you see drinking 7UP”
-first rule of Sprite Club
“Please don’t do this.” – my voice mail greeting
I may not be able to out run the zombies when they come, but this cheeseburger is going to make me taste great