This story lives rent free in my head:
Lord of the Rings star Sean Astin once asked Lesnie [LotR cinematographer] ‘where is the light coming from? ‘ when they were shooting in what should have been a darkened tower.
Lesnie replied, “Same place as the music.”
It’s nothing worse than accidentally becoming a important person at your job.
I was yawning and mentioned my sleep was interrupted by a child in my bed.
My son pipes up and says “well I sleep great last night…because I’m not a parent.”
I’m cryingdjdjdhj and she was serious too 😭😭😭
You might just have to resign…
Take care of yourself, ladies
The idea that librarians spend all their time telling children to shush is an unflattering, outdated, and severe stereotype. We actually spend all our time telling children to stop running.
I was heating up some kimchi fried rice in the microwave when IT EXPLODED WITH A HUGE BOOM and I opened it up like WTF because there was rice and kimchi everywhere.
My wife: Maybe that was from North Korea.
they really wanted me dead for this
Me: Can you get the things you want to take to Manchester?
8yo: *Goes to her room and returns with seven books*
if i ever have to work at McDonald’s, i want to be the person who sits on the hamburgers.
“What is that the trees outside in the wind?”
– Me in bed, wondering what the sound of my dry crusty feet on my sheets is
A – absolute
D – disaster
U – usually
L – looking
T – tired