babysitting a pair of twin babies rn and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane” idk just feels weird
Finally gathered all my thoughts and now they’re jumping me.
Condoms are not biodegradable
Condoms are not biodegradable
Condoms are not biodegradable
Condoms are not biodegradable
Condoms are not biodegradableif you care about the planet have unprotected sex!
Choosing the correct font is crucial…
la cocaina
Just saw a toddler running past my house waving a red flag with their mom chasing after them and I’ve never seen a more accurate depiction of parenthood.
I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.
The first five days after the weekend are the hardest.
I’m hunting wabbits…
The other night I ordered a series of drinks so bizarre that the bartender earnestly asked “what’s going on with you”