@Cpin42

Psychologist: [holds up inkblot] and this one?

Me: a black swirling pit of despair

Psychologist: nope, it’s a duck wearing a funny hat

You Might Also Like

@mollymcnearney

Woman cut me off, stole my parking spot. I honked, flipped her off and went into yoga. Woman came into class as the instructor. Namaste.

@Dani_Feld

LEAVE ME ALONE GRANDMA I’M ENTERTAINING LITERALLY TENS OF PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET

@InternetHippo

If you bought more toilet paper than you need legally I’m allowed to come poop at your house

@SocialustGal13

There are 2 kinds of people:

1) Happy morning people

2) Cranky morning people that fantasize about killing the happy morning people

@BradBroaddus

Some guy just passed toilet paper under the stall without me even asking. I’m not sure if he is a pervert or a wizard.

@jonnysun

*jesus picks up bread*
this is my body
*jesus picks up wine*
this is my blood
*jesus picks up guitar*
this is the STORY OF A GIRL

@Tbone7219

You girls were right about these yoga pants. I have never been more comfortable eating a bucket of extra crispy.

@Jake_Vig

With virtually no power, there still comes a surprisingly large amount of responsibility.

@KevinFarzad

Remember when we spent an entire year learning cursive? That’s why the other countries are winning.

@Stryfe74

Forgetting what you went into the kitchen to get is one thing but, it’s darn scary when you can’t remember why you went into the bathroom!