@badbanana: Reality show idea: "So You Think You Can Touch Mike Tyson's Nose." Hidden camera. Tyson isn't in on it.
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@KeetPotato: kid dressed as dog: "trick or treat" me: wife: "give him some chocolate then" me: "i don't want to kill him linda"
@DaddyJew: Interviewer: why do u feel like you're a good fit for our company? Me: the sign out front says you all are hiring & I'm looking to be hired
@ArfMeasures: [End of day 1, building Rome] BUILDER: We've finished, boss BOSS: For God's sake, keep your voice down, we can drag this job out for weeks