@mikealfredcaine

saw your mum at the supermarket buying vaseline & cucumbers & nothing else, no wonder your dad died if that what she puts in sandwiches

saw your mum at the supermarket buying vaseline & cucumbers & nothing else, no wonder your dad died if that what she puts in sandwiches

- @mikealfredcaine

You Might Also Like

@jergarl

The year is 2057: Friday the 13th part 573…. Jason finds a fabulous pair of shoes to match his outfit.

@KylePlantEmoji

Woman 1: you sure the left half is fine?

Woman 2: I honestly have no preference, really

Woman 1: cool ♥️ I’ll take the right, please

King Solomon: *sweating*

@InternetHippo

It was easier to pick a career when the only choices were farming and witchcraft

@attsmcjay

I’d imagine the only thing worse then getting your period is not getting your period.

@TheTimmyToes

[finally rich enough to go to a tailor]
“How can I help you sir?”
One clothes please!

@MarioInAZ

My kids are young, so when they listen to old school music they think its new. They are currently listening to a hot new band called Queen.

@WheelTod

Not really getting much out of this Bring Your Daughter to Work Day, to be honest. It’s almost as if my 6yo had never used PowerPoint before