@caithuls: OPPONENT: I'm gonna mop the floor with you! ME: Thanks I could really use the help

@ClichedOut: [being murdered] me: are u Scottish murderer: yes me: then I guess u could say i'm being kilt [murdering intensifies]

@ClichedOut: Mother Paper Bag: We need to talk. Teen Bag: *removes earbud* What? M: Your father was plastic. T: But - M: It's true. You're a mixed bag.

@AimeeHelene1: The French cow says MEUX...

@JJSummertime: If I had 3 wishes I'd spend them on my daughter. Happiness, success and her very own little shithead who refuses to replace the TP roll.