@AngelaEhh
@AKATriple So apparently it’s rude if somebody asks if you have a light & you tell them they’ll have to go to the end of the tunnel to find it…
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@AKATriple 
@MikeBigby u guys do know that when u say “frig” we ALL know what you mean? At this point u might as well just say “frog pig” its not even that bad
@Karissajem So, this woman stopped to ask me if my hair color was “supposed to look natural.”
My hair is purple, guys. Purple.
@TheAlexNevil The angel on my shoulder says I should be doing more with my life.
Wait, no, that’s just my mom talking. I forgot I left my phone there.
@ChrisFredGreen person is typing person is typing person is typing person is typing person is typing person is typing person is typing person: hi
@weinerdog4life Maybe the Titanic sank because there were too many cats onboard, you don’t know.
@bingowings14 Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Lego man: Is it because I’m block?
@Mr_Kapowski Who called them police dispatchers and not coperators?
@JoParkerBear Kanye West tweeted that Bill Cosby is innocent?
This is the last straw.
He just lost my vote in 2020.
@ThugRaccoons Me: Well, I’m off to perform another organ transplant.
Wife: You’re a piano mover, you idiot.
Me: I change lives, Linda. I change lives.