So, on July 4th, one of the hottest days of the year, we’re all going to sit outside of our air-conditioned homes and cook over a fire?
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DID YOU KNOW: If every person on the planet lined up along the Earth’s equator, most of them would drown.
And that, Romeo, is why we usually try to take a pulse first.
Turns out 6 foot penguins don’t exist, in related news, I might have just ran over a nun.
My 4yo is trying to sell my own M&M’s back to me. This guy’s going places.
btw, my linkedin endorsements for “Dreamweaver” are for me singing the song Dreamweaver and not for using that software
The fact that crocodile ate your enemy, does not make him your friend.
Intimidate your opponent by fielding a team of flying monkeys
Bees aren’t disappearing. Trump has been secretly deporting them because he thinks pollination is a hoax created by the Chinese.
This looks like a job for..
*I rip open my jacket*
Jacket Repair Man!
*I sew my jacket back together*