[spider walking into first spin class] What’s the deal with the bikes?
Somehow stumbled upon a nude beach. .
Yeah, found myself in the middle of no wear.
You Might Also Like
When one door closes, another opens. Also, you can open the closed door. That’s how doors work. How do you know so little about doors?
Wife: Have u done anything today?
Me: Rode my bike on the back tire down the street
Me: Yes, really, and cut the baby talk
Ok I’ll bite, what is elon musk
I licked 8 lollipops and sealed them in ziplocs during my stomach flu if anyone needs to lose 5lbs by the weekend.
Girl: Gonna keep having sex with this guy until he changes for me
Guy: Can’t believe she keeps having sex w/me I better not change a thing
“One of you will betray me” is such a dramatic thing to say at dinner????
Rememeber when Uruguay fans got angry at Paul Dummett for injuring Suarez & then used Google Translate to insult him
I’m still rubbish at Venn diagrams. I really don’t get them. :/
“I love potatoes! They are delicious and so versatile. If only they could get me laid…”
-how vodka was born