@dshack8: Taught a parrot to repeatedly say "WHERE ARE YOUR GLOVES?" and now I don't have to talk to my kids until Spring so that's pretty cool.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AngelaEhh: This running bra is the best thing invented, they didn't say I'd have to transform into gumby to get the damn thing off though.
@hazelmotes1: Wife: wow, we must have had a lot of trick or treaters come by! Me: wha? Her: Because all the candy is gone Me: Ooooh right. So many.
@underchilde: You could probably master Mandarin while waiting on the last bit of laundry detergent to drizzle into the cap.