The Girl With The Grilled Cheese and Bacon Tattoo
You Might Also Like
If you don’t mind..
if the second I text you back, you call me because you know I’m holding my phone, I will call the police.
WEBSITE CEO: We need a fool-proof way to ensure everyone who enters the site is over 18
“What about clicking on a button that says I’m over 18?”
WEBSITE CEO: Bob, you have done it again
Walked into WalMart and a small child pointed at me and said “what is that thing?”
I don’t know either, kid
I’m fat, so when I get mad, I get massive aggressive.
Me: can I ask a rhetorical question?
Me: well apparently not
By the power vested in me by this case of beer, I now pronounce these three loads of laundry as one.
The first 30 years of childhood are always the hardest.
My kids brought me breakfast in bed, then proceeded to eat MY breakfast. If that doesn’t sum up motherhood I don’t know what does.