@hahaahahahahaha

This is the only criticism of millenials I will accept

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@ThaJawn

What if the washer has been stealing the socks and we have just been blaming the dryer?

@FilthyRichmond

Hey kids! Make your voice heard this election day by hiding your parents identification! (Not applicable in some states)

@novicefather

Shoutout to that one time I confused narcolepsy and necrophilia during a job interview.

@squirrel74wkgn

In my first job, I had to proofread tampon box instructions. Grammar was good, but it was clear that they had no idea how a period works.

@RobinMcCauley

My friends asked me to go camping so I made of a list of the things I will need: 1. new friends

@hippieswordfish

my goth girlfriend says she likes me for who i am on the inside (a skeleton)

@sarcasticmommy4

My son needed a last-minute Halloween costume so I wrapped him like a mummy with my CVS receipt.

You can also scan him for $2 off Advil.