@LostCatDog: Trump is the perfect candidate for American guys who secretly believe they could come out of the stands and score a touchdown
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@NewDadNotes: [Titantic sinks] Jack: wanna share that door so I don’t die? Rose: [door lock noise]
@TitansHomer: I used to get bullied online. Until one day I walked up to the biggest computer in Best Buy and beat the shit out of it.
@bartandsoul: Autocorrect changed “bible” to “bourbon” and that should tell you everything you need to know about me
@MsMosman: Blocked a someone with "Social Media Specialist | Online Reputation Manager" in their bio just to mess with their head. And it's douchy.