you shouldn’t have to go to work tomorrow if the mayor is getting arrested
things are looking up for me, a very eccentric russian guy and his wife who claim to be artists and live in the house they’re building by the lake just invited me to their very weird sounding housewarming party
my problematically hot line cook found kittens in the parking lot and he had to drag me back inside because i’m now just sitting out there trying to feed them shrimp
me wanting to be loved vs. the mortifying ordeal of being known
what’s my dream career? the guy who bakes chickens and hides them in the walls in castlevania. next question
roses are red, violets are blue
*arnold schwarzenegger voice*
tell me who is your daddy
and what does he do
hey it’s me, the girl who just googled “chemistry alphabet” when i meant “periodic table”