Teen horror movies taught me one thing. Vampires really want to hang around with us.
Whenever I see a couple doing yard work, I like the one standing by the bags of dirt who looks like they can’t quite believe they are outdoors and can’t fathom how they’ve gotten caught up in this terrible thing.
More than once I’ve clicked on an ad for clothing that turned out to be for a toddler.
I somehow ended up with a set of 6 fake candles that work off a remote and the delight of the absolute power to light up the room from the couch was most unexpected.
I got a locket as a present, but I haven’t changed the stock photos in it yet. Currently I have been walking around with a baby and a dog I don’t know around my neck.
I’ve learned many things from working with younger people but one is that you can deliver some pretty terrible news followed by lol.
A horror movie but you have to scoot out of the round booth to get away.
When you go to the zoo, one person in your party is required to wear a safari hat. It doesn’t have to be you, but if you’re lucky, it will be.
It’s a horror movie called Overalls in the Portapotty.
Don’t get mad. Get windchimes.
When someone says they haven’t seen the end of a show yet, you’re obligated to tell them You know everyone dies, right?
The water pressure of the hotel shower would best be described as paintball fight.
Having to shovel is so rude. It’s like I have to clean up after the earth, too?
Like seashell soaps, my Ferrero Rocher are decorative.
My coworker was talking to me and I couldn’t hear her and without realizing it I started to take my mask off to hear her better. To.hear.her.better.